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The American story of grief:: Strength Cristina!

A man dies less if another man named

(Miguel Oscar Menassa)

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Kirchner: Ernesto

Ring "Good morning

realized Ana ... the sky is falling or just listen to patients and not look out the window?

"Good morning ... let's see how storm came today!

"Well, better start talking and I do not round. I'm half crazy ... I'm crazy about the bun, I'm about to bite someone.

"I assure you I will not bite. If you understand that you can talk.

-Elena ... always a problem with Elena. Last night I said I'm always oblivious of what she spends. He told me not hear it, and the worst: that I'm only interested in sexual favors ... and what the fuck are sexual favors? ... I almost died! she makes me favors? she does not want anything with me? has no desire for anything? I think that helps me?

- You do you think?

"I ever want less of it. Face is always unsatisfied, invite her to dinner and do not like the restaurant and the waiter's face or dessert, go to movies and the film he seems to have had more scenes, or was too large for the subject, we talked of our children and she is always upset. I think not want anything.

"And you do want.

-be that would not do it? Because when I say I do not know what's wrong is wrong, I know. It's bad all the time and neither she knows why ... I gave him two months ago the psychoanalyst card you told me for her, and know what I said? "If my husband hears me, because I will listen to someone who comes from my husband" ... So I said, in the third person: "my husband" ... I was, "my husband" she ...

"What a complicated sentence that was!

-Si, thus twisted is our life. I wish I had a woman who loves me. I look fondly, I smile, we hold hands to cross the street ... I touch his feet when I go to bed ... this woman is not and never was Elena. I always had to approach her and she of course now I realize: I was doing favors! I'm an asshole. Why live with someone who does not want me?.

-If you live with someone who does not want for it you doing it ...

-Uhhhh ... Santiago has 15 years told me yesterday: "Dad, mom lives in a jar, does not want the cat, "and I kept thinking that I said. First I thought that lives for it, others or the look, or the like. Then I realized I have several jars in your lightbox: painkillers, muscle relaxants, Bach Flower droplets that gives her friend Nini (hahaha ... no, no ... this is Elena, neither this nor that, lol) ... has bottles of all kinds and fewer pills and contraceptive pills ... because he says what you do wrong ... bitch! how come I'm realizing these things now ...

"Sometimes you feel that the sky is falling, and feels threatened and sometimes some truth ... the truth comes. The sky is falling, and you have to bank a storm that had been forming for a long time, no one would perceive it.

"Now I can not make the idiot, get home at night and pretend I did not realize all that ...

- ...

-know what I remembered? when we made our wedding invitations had a terrible fight that almost cost us the project "wedding." Elena became only the parents as inviting. My folks did not exist ... and there was no charge other invitations where they had the names of my parents ... only she has, had.

"And how was it resolved?

"She made me the" favor "to others with the names of my parents and paid for it.

"And that achieved?

-At the time yes, but obviously not, because they spent 17 years and look what I remember today, and every time they show the wedding photos I remember and that gives me a fight!

"Maybe the storm had armed for too many years ago, but did you realize that the signs were of no value to you.

"I always liked me the idiot, but when I heard the phrase, you do favors, I dropped the sky above ...

-Or you were the light.

- ...

"continued the next

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Every last time written

Naturally, I'm like everyone else, I do everything I say is not done.

course do many things wrong and even end up going right, I forgot that I left a mistake.

I firmly believe in what I think and I understand: This proves that we all have a little something in common with the delusional.

Like you, I have what you have in any normal person crazy.

Naturally, I'm like everyone else: Live

thinking about the things of the past as if they were wonderful. Without going too far: Yesterday I dreamed about the cobbler on the corner of my grandmother's house. It looked the same as ever: a man hunched, looking down. I never could see the eyes. When I received the broken shoes to do the miracle to fix them, watched them pulled the dirty pen ointment was supported by the ear (which was also dirty ointment) and wrote: "brown moccasin: 5 weight" ... and when I went to remove it, was never wrong. 5 pesos and gave him in return, shiny loafers. He never saw his eyes. I guess you were brown as brown loafers or ointment that smelled throughout the block.

For me it was a brilliant craftsman. I do not know if there are shoemakers as before.

course were better before the shoes were several times a shoemaker. The old and known as their relatives. Already part of your business. Living sitting on a bench with thousands of shoes around.

course was a man looking down. A shoemaker. And a girl I thought the frosting was a country of Asia Minor or a poison.

course I'm wrong, like everyone else.

Now I know that bitumen is a delicious fish that comes in round cans. If I remember correctly, before the cans had a cock ... The future, no.

All times were better. No doubt.

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Marcos AP Session

Hi Ana:

I write my full morning session, thinking that at 8 will call to ask give me a time and talk with you, tell my fears ... those who are taking my life.

I feel fragile. But I trust that I read (I hear) and anything can change in my life.

should be lying on the couch to say this.

Long ago, a gypsy told me, you will be happy. But fortunately I guessed, was wrong with me. My hand lines were blurred or diverted or certainly felt sorry for me and I lied, as the gypsies know.

I am an unhappy man. Money can not buy happiness, in my case or my hand or my pocket, someone can see the happiness, or my eyes or my future.

I write for days. I could sit and let the words are appearing in their own way. Do not force anything, make mistakes and not feel guilty so threatening.

could not find a reason to write again, this week, and I would ask: why precise reasons for speaking in his analysis? ... Ana, I still can not speak otherwise.

days ago the fear of having an accident and die, has been transformed into desire kill me, let me fall through the windows of my office, I throw myself into the river on the South Coast, or take rat poison (sometimes I am a frightened rat), but I have no good reason. I'm sure I did that.

My life is an absurd paradox. I have many reasons to live well and to care for my wife and my children. I have every reason not kill me ... but this idea does not come out of my head ....

"Kill me? Why? And to me it seems absurd that I wonder.

Yesterday, my wife said it pregnant. I'm happy with that ... It's all a paradox in my head ... I will not hold myself.

have long wanted to have another child. The two come from very large families, we have a good economic move. I again, giving reasons, and reasons.

I'm crazy in a maze with no exit or entry. I am a bull against a matador cowed paralyzed.

Uff ... what horrible sentence I put ... I remembered my old man in the wheelchair giving orders to the maids, as if that mighty man of 50 years instructing employees to meet with the schedule ... torero paralyzed ...

The whore mother who bore me ...

I know ... Now I went with my mother!

That I am the son of a bitch paralytic father and mother!

This is a maze.

Well ... I go to sleep. Within hours I'm calling to ask for another time ....

A kiss ...
Thanks for reading. Marcos AP